The 80’s and It’s Remakes = Fail?

Howdy, new writer on board.  *waves*

When asked to come on board and add some content to this lovely hat-tip to the 80’s, I had some serious things to ponder.  The first and foremost thought was honestly what the hell do I even remember about the 80’s?  Being a horror movie fangirl, I didn’t need to look further for starters than that genre, putting my finger directly on my DVD boxed set of A Nightmare on Elm Street.

Of course, these days, I can’t think about a beloved slasher film (or ANYTHING really from the 80’s) without having to think about the *dundundun* remakes that are consistently popping up all over the place.  I’d like to believe we are able to embrace the past and move forward, not sit back and think Wow, this idea was killer!  But I know how to make it better.  Think of all the original content we are missing out on by trying to redress things we had no problem loving when we were kids or teenagers.

But, for the sake of an article on a site dedicated to 80’s memorabilia, we’ll just stick with the classic Nightmare on Elm Street film unless I feel long winded and delve into other topics along this same vein.

I’m just gonna have to start off by questioning how anyone who’s seen the original could sit back and remotely pretend it wasn’t scary enough.  Robert Englund has played a consistent scary bastard for several films in the series, the first being the most notably unsympathetic Freddy to ever grace the screen.  As a child?  I had to sleep in my sister’s bed for a week (and it was a twin matress… I laugh just thinking about how the hell we fit on there without one or the other elbowing an eye out).   Getting sucked into a mattress by a dream demon is serious business, and for the time the special effects and setup they used to pull even that particular scene off were impressive.

When talking about the new remake (gag me, really), one of the things I’ve heard is that “This Freddy doesn’t talk, thus making him scarier than the original version.”  To this I say… HELLO, anyone home?  The original film had very scant dialogue for Freddy and he was nothing like the later films where his sarcasm and delight in torment and death truly shined and made him an icon more so than before.  Freddy needs to be scarier?  Pu-lease.

When this Nightmare on Elm Street remake hits theaters, you won’t find me there.  You probably won’t find me watching it on DVD either.  It just seems sacrilegious to put money into something that is MORE than capable of still functioning as a scary cinematic piece of brilliance.  Then again, maybe I will see it, just so I can sit back and say “I told you so.”

Come on, America.  I know you have fresh and invigorating content out there.  Quit trying to spruce up your childhood memories just so you can show them off to your friends or to your children.  Just sit back, put in the original classic film, and enjoy it as it was originally envisioned… scary Freddy Kruger proclaiming “THIS is God” and all.

*For the record, I do think some remakes have been good for a series in various ways for various reasons.  I am, however, a purist at heart when it comes to some of my childhood/teenage fandoms.  Horror movies would, obviously, be one of my biggest gripes.

Popularity: 2% [?]